Your Tax Dollars At Work

Remember when FauxNews went after Al Franken for using the FauxNews logo and the phrase "fair and balanced" on the cover of his "Lying Liars" book? What did the judge in that lawsuit say about Fox's case? Oh yeah -- I remember: "Wholly without merit."

Well, the Bush Administration is trying to pursue a similar claim against The Onion:

"It has come to my attention that The Onion is using the presidential seal on its Web site," Grant M. Dixton, associate counsel to the president, wrote to The Onion on Sept. 28. (At the time, Mr. Dixton's office was also helping Mr. Bush find a Supreme Court nominee; days later his boss, Harriet E. Miers, was nominated.)

Citing the United States Code, Mr. Dixton wrote that the seal "is not to be used in connection with commercial ventures or products in any way that suggests presidential support or endorsement." Exceptions may be made, he noted, but The Onion had never applied for such an exception.

The Onion was amused. "I'm surprised the president deems it wise to spend taxpayer money for his lawyer to write letters to The Onion," Scott Dikkers, editor in chief, wrote to Mr. Dixton. He suggested the money be used instead for tax breaks for satirists.

More formally, The Onion's lawyers responded that the paper's readers - it prints about 500,000 copies weekly, and three million people read it online - are well aware that The Onion is a joke.

Just because 3.5 million readers of The Onion know it is a joke doesn't necessarily mean that Bush understands this. Maybe our commander-in-chief really does believe that Pittsburgh is unprepared for a full-scale zombie attack.